Healthy Body

How I am Changing My Relationship with Food

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Me about 1 year ago. Not unhappy, but unhealthy.

Last year I knew I was unhealthy. I knew it because I felt it. It wasn’t just my weight, it was my energy levels, it was my skin, it was my aches and pains—they all told me I was unhealthy. And I was ready to listen to my body and do something about it.

But what was I going to do?

Over the past two years I had seen posts and done a little research into Whole30, but I had no idea what it actually was. I knew it was extreme, and I knew I needed extreme. So I started to read more about it.

As I researched, I realized this was the plan I was looking for. I wasn’t looking for a diet to lose weight quick. I wanted knowledge. I wasn’t afraid of putting in some hard work, but I wanted to know that I would come out the other side empowered and inspired to keep going.

That is what Whole30 has done for me.

I have committed to openly sharing my health journey, and Whole30 has been a big part of that. My relationship with food has changed in the past nine months and I think yours can too.

My goal is to share somewhat of a beginner’s guide to the plan. Whether you are looking to make some changes yourself, or you are simply curious what all the Whole30 hype is about—please keep reading.

What you need to know about Whole30

1) Who is Whole30 for?

Whole30 if for people who are sick and tired of being sick and tired.

That’s me. Maybe it’s you too. This plan is not specifically for male or female, old or young, overweight or skinny people. It’s adaptable and it’s for anyone.

 

2) What is Whole30?

Whole30 is a 30-day plan to reset your relationship with food. The creator, Melissa Hartwig, is clear that it’s not a diet. Diets are temporary. Diets work fast. Diets focus on weight loss.

Whole30 focuses on learning your body. What foods fuel your body well? What foods make your body react poorly?

Whole30 aims to eliminate inflammation-causing foods for 30 days and then slowly reintroduce them over the next 15 days to see how your body reacts to them. The foods it recommends to remove are done so because they are known to cause reactions in some people.

Are they all affecting you when you eat them? Probably not. But the truth is, I didn’t know what in my diet was affecting me because I had never isolated any specific foods.

By removing all these foods for 30 days, you are giving your body a chance to heal itself. When you start reintroducing these food items one group at a time, you will notice if something triggers an unpleasant reaction. These reactions could be digestive, skin related, headaches, weight gain . . . and the list goes on!

You then have the knowledge to make your future food decisions.

My husband, for example, knew for a while that pizza messed up his stomach. But what was it about pizza? Was it the cheese? Was it the gluten in the crust? Was it the meat toppings he was choosing? By isolating each of these areas in reintroduction, he now knows dairy is not kind to his stomach.

He can use this knowledge to make better food choices when he is out. If there is a choice between cake and ice cream, he knows he likes the ice cream more, but then has to decide whether it is worth the stomachache later. Poor Brian! He’ll probably end up passing on both, because if he can’t have ice cream what’s the fun in cake?!

Whole30 is about arming yourself with knowledge. It is about learning to make choices that serve you, not learning to follow a list of rules to get typical results.

If you are looking for a temporary meal plan that will make you drop some pounds fast so you can then go right back to your old habits—this is not for you.

If you are tired of yo-yoing and looking for something sustainable—this may be for you.

whole30 is arming yourself

3) What do I have to give up?

I’ll be honest, the list is daunting! So, I’ll just list off the major things quick—like ripping off a Band-Aid!

Avoid:

Dairy—cow, goat, sheep products
ALL grains—even gluten-free ones
Sugar—natural and artificial
Legumes—beans, soy, peanuts
Additives—sulphites, msg, carrageenan
Alcohol—not even in cooking

Those are the basic things to avoid.

But then it gets into the real heart of the matter.

There are three Key Principles that will make or break your overall success:

  1. No baked goods.

This one rule might have helped me succeed in changing my habits more than anything else.

If I am craving a brownie and I make a delicious concoction with ground up almonds and dates and cacao and use all ingredients that are “approved”, my mind knows that. But all my taste buds know is that I wanted something sweet and I got it. This does nothing to change my actual cravings and habits.

To follow this path out, think of yourself one week after you have finished a strict diet. Every evening when the kids are finally in bed, you have been enjoying a “fake” treat. But suddenly those restrictions are no longer around you and you find yourself slowly reaching for the real, much more satisfying, brownie.

Maybe it takes you more than a week to slip back into your old ways. But when you swap out ingredients to create “just as good” treats, you have not changed habits, you have just temporarily substituted what you really want.

Imagine the same scenario at three o’clock in the afternoon. You are tired and just want chocolate so bad. But you are on a diet. So instead you grab a handful of berries and a banana.

You made a healthy choice.  But you still made a sweet choice.

You had a sweet craving and you fed it. When your willpower weakens and your diet guidelines relax, that three o’clock craving is still there and this time you will reach for the chocolate. I know. I’m talking about myself.

But what if you could actually defeat that craving?

You can tackle it one of two ways:

Option One: You can eat a bigger, more fat-filled lunch that will carry over until your evening meal. I know, “fat filled” doesn’t usually come into play when we are talking about getting healthy.

But good fats fill you up and give you energy. It’s not a bad thing. If you know you ate a satisfying lunch, wait five minutes when that craving comes up. Are you really hungry? Or are you just stressed out or bored?

Letting the craving pass unsatisfied tells your mind you don’t really need sugar at that moment. You are retraining your habits.

Option Two: Maybe you wait five minutes and your stomach starts to rumble and the desire just gets stronger. You really are hungry! Don’t just reach for something sweet—that’s feeding your normal habits and cravings.

Instead, be prepared with a protein and fat packed snack. This could be nuts, boiled eggs, lunch meat, and maybe even a banana with the protein. Basically, have a mini-meal. If you can do it sitting at a table, even better!

Train your mind to know you eat planned, full meals and don’t just snack mindlessly throughout the day.

Changing your habits is hard. It takes time. But when I realize it took me over 30 years to create these habits, it makes it a little easier to give myself some time to change them.

train your mind

  1. No Weighing Yourself

Seeing the numbers go down on a scale is super motivating. But the same number over and over can make you lose all motivation.  If you have ever been on a diet before, you know this first hand.

You have made such hard choices for an entire week. You have passed up baked goods, you have menu planned, you have gone out and exercised.  You step on the scale ready to see the results of all your hard work. And the number has not changed from the week before.

All that hard work seems pointless. You might as well just eat the donut today, it didn’t do any good to pass it up last week.

Or maybe you lost weight, but it wasn’t quite as big as you wanted. So this week you will starve yourself a little more. You’ll push harder in your training. You know this kind of dedication and sacrifice is not sustainable, but you just want to reach that goal quickly.

Real life change takes time.

And real health means so much more than a number. Do not sabotage your success by playing head games with a scale.

If you really follow the rules of Whole30, you weigh yourself on Day 1 and Day 30. And chances are the numbers will go down. They have for me each time I have done it.

But that was just one of the results I have noticed—not the whole picture. 

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September 2017: Before my first Whole30 & April 2018: After 2 rounds of Whole30
  1. No Counting Things

This is one of the things I love most about Whole30!

I don’t count calories!  I don’t count macros!  I don’t count points!  I just eat!  It’s glorious!

I am super unorganized at tracking things. I start and then I don’t follow through. Yes, I need to be more disciplined, but I need to be more disciplined in a lot of areas of my life.

Adding up calories or counting points is not an area I want to give my energy.

I focus on putting healthy, non-processed foods into my body and I do it until I’m full and then I stop.

It’s an amazing concept really.

 

Okay, enough with what you can’t do…

4) What can I eat?

So much good food!

For real. Meat, vegetables, fruit, nuts, oils—it’s all fair game!

Here’s a big thing for me: you don’t have to cut out carbs. Woohoo! I eat potatoes when I am doing a Whole30. I don’t make homemade chips or French fries (that goes along with fake baked goods), but I do enjoy potatoes as an addition to a lot of meals.

Why do I love this? It all goes back to sustainability and motivation.

I know I could lose weight faster if I cut out the majority of my carbohydrate intake. But I’m not looking for a fast solution. I’m trying to change my habits and lifestyle.

I can be as boring or as creative as I want when I am following Whole30. I could eat chicken and broccoli every day for lunch and dinner. Yuck! That would make me go crazy! Or I could spend hours in the kitchen every evening making a variety of gourmet dishes from scratch.

I recommend falling somewhere between repetitive meals and time-consuming meals.

I have learned so much about cooking and tried so many new things in the past year. It’s amazing how much your taste buds change when you totally remove sugar from your diet.

I love flavor now. I love experimenting with new ingredients and recipes.

Will this happen for everyone who follows Whole30? No.

It’s like anything else in life, you will get out what you put in.

food collage

5) How Hard is this really?

We’ve all said it, “I could never go without chocolate for 30 days!” Or “I just can’t drink my coffee black”.

Right away some of you have read these rules and told yourself, this is too hard for me.

Melissa Hartwig is maybe most famous for her tough love on this subject. You can find her now famous response on the official whole30 website.

This is not hard. Don’t you dare tell us this is hard. Fighting cancer is hard. Birthing a baby is hard. Losing a parent is hard. Drinking your coffee black. Is. Not. Hard. You’ve done harder things than this, and you have no excuse not to complete the program as written. It’s only thirty days, and it’s for the most important health cause on earth—the only physical body you will ever have in this lifetime.

I agree. There are harder things in life than drinking black coffee. I have gone through one of the hardest things anyone can face in life when I lost my son. I’m not even going to compare the two.

But that said—THIS IS HARD!

It is hard for the same reason grief is hard. It forces us to get real with our own thoughts. You will have to fight through every excuse you or someone else will throw at you. You will have to determine beforehand that there are no “cheat days” and that you can’t tell yourself “just this one time”.

You will have to know your health is worth more than 30 days of sacrifice.

I think there were a few things that helped me achieve that focus and complete a “cheat-free” Whole30.

First, I bought the book * (Whole30:The Official 30 Day Guide  or if you are in the UK, this version) a month before I started.

I read the book. I absorbed the message into my heart. I wanted to change my habits and not just achieve a quick fix. I recommend you do the same. If you aren’t going to buy the book, at least spend some time on the website.

Next, I had a partner.

brian and I in the rain
Encouraging each other even in the storms

Brian was 100% committed along with me to do this thing. This was best-case scenario and I realize that. My partner was my best friend who also happens to live in the same house as me, do life with me daily, and had my best interest at heart.

If you are single or your spouse is not interested in participating, I believe you can still be successful. You can enlist accountability in other friends who are going solo, or even find an online community.

If you can’t find current accountability, find someone who has gone through it in the past and will tell you, “Yes, it’s hard, but it’s possible!” (Cough cough, me!)

I’m not saying Whole30 is for everyone. There are very few things in life that are for everyone. But it was for me. And maybe it is for you. Are you willing to find out?

—Rebekah

*This post contains an affiliate link. That means if you clink on the link and buy the book, I get a portion of the sale and you don’t pay any extra!

Healthy Body

How I Set Balanced Weight Loss Goals

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I have officially been back on the healthy train for two months now. And in those two months I have lost exactly 20 pounds.  I have done this largely as a result of following a Whole30 lifestyle.

However, Whole30 is not really concerned with weight loss. In fact, if you follow the rules, you should not weigh yourself at all while participating in Whole30.  So I packed away my scale the first time I completed a Whole30 and I think it was the best thing I could have done.

Numbers on a scale do not define success.

But numbers get people’s attention. Numbers get my attention. I will say over and over again that a number does not tell the whole story, but it does contribute to the story.

That 20 pounds that is off of my body, that’s 20 pounds that my joints had to carry around every step I took. That’s 20 pounds that was eating up my energy and the resources I was putting into my body to fuel it. That’s 20 pounds that I no longer have to account for in my daily life. That’s a big deal!

So how do we come to a healthy balance of knowing the scale isn’t everything and knowing that it does mean something?

For me, a lot of it comes down to goal setting. If all of my health goals are based on numbers going down on a scale, then yes, I will be super concerned with those numbers and base my view of success around them. But if we can expand our goals, I think we start to achieve balance.

How do I set healthy goals?

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1) I define my “why”

Why do I want to lose weight?

I want to have energy to live my life. I want to work throughout the day without a 3 o’clock pit of despair (my totally non-dramatic way of describing what usually happens to me mid-day). I want to have energy to play with my kids when they get home from school. I want the energy to cook a healthy meal for my family. I want to be able to keep my eyes open to enjoy my husband after the kids are tucked in at night.

I want ALL DAY energy!

I want to feel comfortable in my clothes. I’m not talking about wearing a specific size, just to feel like I can move and sit and live life in comfort.

I want to fit into small seats. This became a big motivator for me on one of our flights a year ago. As I buckled the seatbelt around me, I realized I was dangerously close to not making the “click”. Around the same time we started our first Whole30, we also booked a dream vacation for our family the next year that would require me to be able to fit into rides and buckle safety belts. That vacation is still four months away and continues to be a big motivator for me.

I wanted to heal some health problems I was experiencing that I was pretty certain were linked to my diet. I made a list of all the things that felt slightly off—or even way off! Many of these issues have cleared up at this point, and that’s great! But I keep a running list of things that may or may not be related to what I put into my body.

And most importantly, I want to gain a healthy perspective on my body. As a Christian, I believe this body that I live in is important. I believe God created it in His image. I believe Christ died for it. I believe the Holy Spirit indwells it. I believe my physical body is important to God. And I believe that I can take care of this body as an act of worship to Him.

Looking at this list, I have quite a few “whys”.

Maybe you have one big one. Maybe you have more than me. But have you ever sat down and actually written them out? Can I encourage you to do that right now? Open a note on your phone or grab a pen and a piece of paper.

Actually take the time to physically define why you want to lose weight or get healthy.

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Take the time to write out your reasons

2) I set measurable “non-scale” goals

These goals relate directly to my reasons I set out for wanting to be healthy.

My Why: I want to work throughout the day without a 3 o’clock pit of despair.

The Goal: Eliminate my afternoon cup of coffee.

While I cannot physically measure my energy levels, I can know weather I got to the end of the day without multiple cups of caffeine. (This is a goal I’m still working on by the way.)

My Why: I want the energy to cook a healthy meal for my family.

The Goal: Cook 5 meals at home this week.

This is measurable. It gives me some room to have left overs a few nights or go out if it’s just one of those days, But it sets the goal to eat at home which usually means healthier meals. Right now I probably cook six meals a week on average. It’s something that I actually enjoy and try to make a priority.

My Why: I want to feel comfortable in my clothes.

The Goal: Be able to easily button my jeans the first time I wear them after washing.

You know what I’m talking about here. There’s that false sense of excitement you get when you think your jeans are getting too big and then you wash them and suddenly “they shrunk in the dryer”. Yeah, it happens to all of us.

My Why: I want to gain a healthy perspective on my body.

The Goal: Memorize scripture that relates to this area.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 is a great place to start:

Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.

Write verses on notecards and tape them around your house, screenshot verses and make them your phone background. Do what you need to do to keep this journey in an eternal focus.

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I won’t go through all my goals, but I think the picture is clear:  Turn your vague “whys” into measurable goals that don’t mention numbers or require stepping on a scale.

3) I don’t tie my scale goals to a calendar date

I wanted to lay all that out first, but I also want to be honest that I do set scale related goals for myself as well. But I don’t link those goals with a certain time frame.

For example I don’t say, I want to lose 50 pounds by summer. I can control what I put into my body and how much I move my body, but I cannot control how quickly my body responds to that. So if I say I want to lose 10 pounds a month and I only lose 8, that’s failure. And losing 8 pounds should never be considered failure!

So instead I usually write out my weight descending 10 pounds every line.

For example, if your starting weight was 200 pounds, you would write:

200 —
190 —
180 —
170 —
etc.

And then I come up with a reward for each milestone.

This reward is not linked to seasons or clothes. So I don’t say I’ll buy myself a pair of flip-flops when I lose 20 pounds, because I might reach that in December. I don’t say I will buy myself new jeans when I lose 30 pounds because I might need new ones when I lose 15 and they still fit the same after I’ve lost 30. The number on your scale does not equal your body composition and does not predict the areas you will lose weight in.

Don’t set yourself up for disappointment.

Some rewards I have set in the past include: a manicure/pedicure, new book, sunglasses, massage, or a new piercing. They could build up to something big like a weekend away. I think it’s important to think of these rewards ahead of time and have them in mind.

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When rewarding yourself, a scary/fun selfie is a must!

I set my rewards at ten pounds because I have a larger number I want to lose. (Also my rewards usually cost money, and I need time to save up that money in between rewards.) But if you have a smaller amount you want to lose, set your rewards every five pounds or every two pounds. Or reward yourself every week that you stick to your healthy eating plan weather you lose weight or not.

Just please don’t reward yourself with junk food. That makes no sense.

A few weeks ago I wrote about how I found myself at one point deep in grief and heavy in weight gain. Since that point about a year ago, I have lost almost 50 pounds. That’s incredible! But it has actually been such a long year of back and forth, that I did not even realize that until I just looked back at my notes from when I first started and wrote out my goals and rewards.

Again I will say, write these things down.

You think you will never forget how you feel or that number on the scale right now. But you will. When you start changing your habits, you start creating a new normal, your body starts feeling different, and you forget that it used to hurt to move that way. Your scale gets stuck at a new weight and you forget that it used to be stuck much higher than that.

Nothing is as encouraging and motivating as remembering how far you have already come.

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And if you haven’t even started yet, let me encourage you with how far I have come. I haven’t arrived where I want to be yet, but that’s okay—it’s not a race, it’s a journey.  It’s not about weight, it’s about health.  It’s not just about physical health, it’s about total health. And I’m committed to continue on this journey. Even if it’s a year before I lose another 20 pounds, that’s okay.

The scale doesn’t tell the whole story.

Subscribe at the bottom of this blog to continue on this journey with me, and then tell me your ‘why’ in the comments below. I’d love to hear it and gain some encouragement from you as well.

— Rebekah